Notes To Myself : My struggle to become a Person
----- Hugh Prather -----
When I first read Notes to Myself several years ago, a deep bell of remebering rang within me and I had this freeing feeling: 'Why didn't I write these notes to myself? But since I didn't, couldn't, wouldn't - Gos bless you, Hugh Prather, for doing it for me!'

When my friend said he had trouble getting along with his wife, I liked him better. I like a man with faults, especially when he knows it. To err is human - I am uncomfortable around gods.

As I look back on my life, one of the most constant and powerful things I have experienced is the desire to be more than I am at the moment - an unwillingness to let my mind remain in the pettiness where it idles-a desire to increase the boundaries of myself-a desire to feel more, learn more, express more-a desire to grow, improve, purify, expand. I used to interpret this inner push as meaning that there was some one thing out there that I wanted to do or be or have. And I have spent too much of my life trying to find it. But now I know that this energy within me is seeking more than the mate or the profession or the religion, more even than pleasure or power or meaning. It is seeking more of me; or better, it is, thank God, releasing more of me.

The key to motivation is to look at how far I have come rather than how far I have to go.

The number of things just outside the perimeter of my financial reach remains constant no matter how much my financial condition improves. With each increase in my income a new perimeter forms and I experience the same relative sense of lack. I believe that I know the specific amount needed that would allow me to have or do these few things I can't quite afford, and if my income would increase by that much I would then be happy. Yet when the increase comes, I find that I am still discontent because from my new financial position I can now see a whole new set of things I don't have. The problem will be solved when I accept that happiness is a present attitude, not a future condition.

And if I lack the grounds to feel guilty over my own emotions, how can I criticize yours?

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